It’s Bacon..Get Over It!
Written by: Andrea Angileri
It’s been awhile since this whole ‘Bacon Craze’ has been going on and I’ve humored it for long enough. Truth is America…We’re just getting stupid about bacon. I mean…bacon is great…don’t get me wrong but the products that are coming out are starting to cross the line. I’m not even talking about the bacon flavored food. I’m talking about novelty items like these:
I mean…’customer favorite’…really? People are all snuggling up with their bacon throws and pillows and throwing on their bacon scarves before they tackle a cold day. What is happening to us? There is also the ‘bacon bra’, which when I Google images I see greasy uncooked bacon strips on breasts. It sounds like a good way to food poison your lover.
What about before the fact. The ‘came from a pig’ part. Think about how degrading the word ‘pig’ is. Men are pigs! He’s a chauvinistic pig! What a sloppy pig you are! There goes that ‘pig’ cop! Now kill the animal and cook it up? ALL HAIL BACON!
Turkey gets the love for Thanksgiving. Steaks get summer time thumbs up. Fish is ‘brain’ food. We are all just too busy figuring out ways to cook chicken. Ham? Just gets taken for granted.
Again, let me clarify, I do eat bacon. I like the way you can walk into a house at 5:00 p.m. and ask, “Did you cook bacon for breakfast? It’s a great house fragrance. My husband and I have different ‘bacon’ styles. I like mine a little soft and bendy, I like to chew on things a bit….whereas my husband likes things crisp, and doesn’t let up until the kitchen is full of hot steam. I have also accurately described our ‘parenting style’ differences.
I wasted enough of my breath on bacon. I’ll still dish out the extra 50 cents to a dollar to throw it on cheeseburgers, but regretfully I have no plans to strap on or snuggle with anything that looks like it.